Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCE
Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE