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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.

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Get Good Know Look Old People Tell

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
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Always Birthday Joke Me Such Time
I was a high school throw-out.
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There’s nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
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My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn’t let him cut my nails.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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The other day my house caught fire.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
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That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
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As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
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Egg Except Food Life Only Pleasure Salami Second Sex
There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
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When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
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I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
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