My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
ALAN KINGMy son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
ALAN KINGMy father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
ALAN KINGAn old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KINGMy mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
ALAN KINGThe other day my house caught fire.
ALAN KINGAs a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
ALAN KINGComedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
ALAN KINGWhen I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KINGModesty is not one of my virtues.
ALAN KINGOne thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
ALAN KINGMilton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
ALAN KINGThe ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
ALAN KINGMy father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
ALAN KINGI didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
ALAN KINGEating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
ALAN KINGA summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
ALAN KING