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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

Alan King

We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
ALAN KING

Ability Behave Fun Make Society Watch
Everything my mother made had to cook for 80 hours, and when she made matzoh balls she didn’t know fluffy. Everything sank.
ALAN KING

Ball Everything Matzoh Mother Sank
We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator…
ALAN KING

Grub Hypochondriac Miser Money Worrywart
When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
ALAN KING

Bigotry Father First Oppression Read Talk Think Time
Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
ALAN KING

Better Salami Sex Slice Thickly
When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KING

All Birthday Celebrate Everybody Father Kid Tell Tree Use
It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
ALAN KING

Anyone Food Friendship Imagine Interest Last Like More Someone
If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
ALAN KING

Book Love Marriage Read Separate Two Want
Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
ALAN KING

Amazing Away Call Comedy Get Hard Laugh Once Turn
And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
ALAN KING

Always Art Even Humour Somebody Want Weapon
Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
ALAN KING

Funny Holocaust Joke Make Occur People Way
I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
ALAN KING

Carnegie Hall Have Made Practice
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING

Always Birthday Joke Me Such Time
Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
ALAN KING

Back Ball Been Fifty Laugh Listen Love People Theatre Villian Year
Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
ALAN KING

Fight Keep Marriage Nature Stranger Way
Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
ALAN KING

Alongside Dictionary Milton Party Took Tremendous Vaudeville

When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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