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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

Alan King

Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
ALAN KING

Funny Holocaust Joke Make Occur People Way
I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
ALAN KING

Audience Big Comedy Identity Thing Think
I always plan dinner first thing in the morning.
ALAN KING

Always Dinner First Morning Plan Thing
The other day my house caught fire.
ALAN KING

Caught Day Fire House Other
One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
ALAN KING

Again Apple Cloudy Drank Faint Juice Little Morning Nurse One Pour Run Specimen Tube
Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
ALAN KING

Business Course Have Hook Learn Survive
You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
ALAN KING

Get Good Know Look Old People Tell
As a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
ALAN KING

Better Father Parent
I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
ALAN KING

Go Kitchen Mother never Other Pot Room Saw
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING

Always Birthday Joke Me Such Time
Banks have a new image. Now you have ‘a friend,’ your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?
ALAN KING

Bank Banker Chain Come Down Friend Image New Pen
We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
ALAN KING

Ability Behave Fun Make Society Watch
When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
ALAN KING

Day Decide Dinner Go Morning Through
My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
ALAN KING

Father Help Leave Not True
I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again.
ALAN KING

Again Go Role Something Sympathetic Thirty Two Week
As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
ALAN KING

Egg Except Food Life Only Pleasure Salami Second Sex

When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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