If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you’ll have a good life.
ADAM CAROLLAThe very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
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It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I’ve done so much morning radio that I won’t be overwhelmed by it, but it’s still going to be a challenge.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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Everyone keeps saying, “Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating.” It’s like saying, “How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she’s been with Brad Pitt?” I don’t care.
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
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I’m not sexist, I’m just a realist.
ADAM CAROLLA






