If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
ADAM CAROLLAThe main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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You don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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This is why the terrorists hate us. And it’s not the glitter and it’s not the pomp and circumstance.
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If you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course… Real estate values go ‘boom!’
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Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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All’s the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
ADAM CAROLLA