That’s the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can’t pursue your dream till you’re 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
ADAM CAROLLAI could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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I’ve never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I’ve never left behind.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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I know there’s no God and I know most of the world knows that as well. They just won’t admit it because there’s another thing they know. They know they’re going to die and it freaks them out.
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Lets not focus on saving a nickel… lets focus on making a buck.
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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
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Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.
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The shuttle is the worst $20 you’ll ever save. It adds 90 minutes to whatever a Town Car or cab would have been.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
ADAM CAROLLA