I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
ADAM CAROLLAJunior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
-
-
I’ve always boxed, I always taught boxing.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money – do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLA -
We’re all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I know everything because I know nothing.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I’m like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty.
ADAM CAROLLA -
We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Here’s what you know: you know when you’re getting laid, and you know when it’s all over. Those are the only two things you’re aware of.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.
ADAM CAROLLA -
If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
ADAM CAROLLA -
My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
ADAM CAROLLA -
People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
ADAM CAROLLA