Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
ADAM CAROLLAToss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I’ve done so much morning radio that I won’t be overwhelmed by it, but it’s still going to be a challenge.
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
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I’d never hurt another person.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that’s out of this world. I’ll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn’t have to be between Thai and Mexican every night.
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Maybe I’m delusional but I’m usually funny. It’s not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average.
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If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
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I don’t know anything about computers.
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All TV is, is really: ‘Don’t you want to be this, aren’t you glad you’re not that.’ There’s nothing really in the middle.
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Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they’re so suggestible.
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It’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
ADAM CAROLLA






