black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

W. C. Fields

You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS

Enough Fools Live People Time Yourself
Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
W. C. FIELDS

Food Funny
Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Believe
Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
W. C. FIELDS

Easy Time Yourself
Don’t worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. FIELDS

Heart Live Worry Yourself
There’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Parents Tough
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Myself Wine
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Advice Age Alcohol Authority Give Up Myself
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FIELDS

Better Sex Worst
Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
W. C. FIELDS

Trust Yourself
I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
I’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDS

Equality Freedom Hate Myself
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.
W. C. FIELDS

Herself Thankful Woman
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Funny Old World
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Start

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes