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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

Adam Carolla

A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it’s not a great way to go.
ADAM CAROLLA

Crisis Dalliance might Paper People Practice Right Truthful
When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
ADAM CAROLLA

Christmas Country Dad Feel Instantly Kid Wrong
I don’t like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
ADAM CAROLLA

Best Each Friend Man Men Other Sex Spouse Thinking Tolerate Wife
Don’t do your best, do my best.
ADAM CAROLLA

Advice Best Force Mine Order Question Work
If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
ADAM CAROLLA

Absolutely Ever Funny Humor Idea Relationship
I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
ADAM CAROLLA

Form Format Freedom Mess Podcasting
We’re all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Animal Motivate Respond Same Sex Somebody Stimuli Thinking
A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
ADAM CAROLLA

Chick Guy Mean Money People Successful Thinking
If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
ADAM CAROLLA

Affiliation Everyone Glenn Beck Life Media Started Towards Worried
When I’m in power, here’s how I’m gonna put the country back on its feet. I’m going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the ‘tardiest of the ‘tards like the thick crust.
ADAM CAROLLA

Agent Back Country Feet Gonna Mountain Power Sterilizing
You’re 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don’t have to kill yourself, you’re just waiting.
ADAM CAROLLA

Club Due Kil Funny Home Humor Sit Wait Yourself
Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
ADAM CAROLLA

Bag Creative Name Sleep Sleeping Speaking
You don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Cruise Feeling Good Internet Name Walk
[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail twice a month.
ADAM CAROLLA

Equivalent Fat Giving Government Morning Overwhelmed People Person Sending
I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
ADAM CAROLLA

Audience Monetization Really Secondary Thinking
Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
ADAM CAROLLA

Advantage Ask Focus Asking Judging Smell Someone

I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

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