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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.

Norm MacDonald

I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
NORM MACDONALD

Ideas Memories Myself Reality Strong Word
You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin’ life again? Man, that’s rough, eh?
NORM MACDONALD

Best Dreams Goodness Life Right Wake Up Yourself
In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.
NORM MACDONALD

Adversity Dangerous Escape Reason Suffering Understand
Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
NORM MACDONALD

Philosophy Prejudice Reason Strong Weakness
I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
NORM MACDONALD

Cook Intelligence Man Myself Thankful Woman
The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
NORM MACDONALD

Imperfection Man Ourselves Praise Seek Virtue
The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
NORM MACDONALD

Adversity Friendship Oneself Prosperity Reason True
All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
NORM MACDONALD

Business Confidence Disappointment Future Learning People Weakness
Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
NORM MACDONALD

Form Jealous Philosophy Sweet
You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALD

Hate Love Rival Team Yourself
There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
NORM MACDONALD

Grief Man Mistake Virtue
All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
NORM MACDONALD

Death Life Money Myself People Thinking Try
Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
NORM MACDONALD

Care Carry Force Limitation Restriction Worst Youth
I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
NORM MACDONALD

Dog Funny Material Myself Protection Value
The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
NORM MACDONALD

Different Moral Nation Reading
Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
NORM MACDONALD

Acknowledgement Hypocrisy Shame

In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.

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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.

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Popular Authors

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