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I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.

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Funny Goodness Myself Oneself Worth

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Coffee Myself Time
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
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Darkness Device Myself
Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
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Bacteria Culture People
All those who believe in psychokinesis – raise my hand.
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Believe Funny Hands Myself Science Yourself
I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Funny Goodness Myself Oneself Worth
If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap?
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Children Funny Hands Himself Mom
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
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Eyes Myself Prescription Ran Walk
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
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Mathematics Pronunciation Sound
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
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Buy Fame Friendship Herself Popular Toy
One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, “Didn’t you see the stop sign?” I said, “Yeah, but I don’t believe everything I read”
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Believe Funny Myself Police Reading See Stop Time
$Steven Wright Quote - Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.$

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Funny Mathematics People Trouble
The older you get, the more you learn to see what you’ve been taught to see. When you’re a kid, you see what’s there.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Children Deep Difference Growth Learning Old Philosophy See Teaching Yourself
Clones are people two.
STEVEN WRIGHT

One Liner People
I wish the first word I ever said was the word “quote”, so right before I die I could say “unquote”.
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Death Myself Quote Right Talk Word
When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
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Inspirational Motivational Struggle Way Wrong Yourself
There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
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Idiot Ocean Stand Wait

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