“How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t live there?”

I wish the first word I ever said was the word “quote”, so right before I die I could say “unquote”.

I like to reminisce with people I don’t know.

Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, “Didn’t you see the stop sign?” I said, “Yeah, but I don’t believe everything I read”

I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?

Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

Self Love really is the only rule. All the other forms of love are just manifestations of it.

Anybody who gives you a belief system is your enemy, because the belief system becomes the barrier for your eyes, you cannot see the truth.

They say, “follow your heart,” but sometimes the heart can be unreliable when it tangles in the blindness of love.

Heartbreak is a brutal teacher.

Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.

Once I heard how deep music could touch people and what it can make you feel and all of these emotions it could bring out, I was really fascinated with it all.

Be of love a little more careful than of anything.

It’s not the time in your life, it’s the life in your time.