No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree.
W. C. FIELDSNo doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree.
W. C. FIELDSPhiladelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDSMoney will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDSI personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDSI have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. FIELDSI don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDSI don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. FIELDSTake me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDSI never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. FIELDSAttitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. FIELDSComedy is a serious business. A serious business with only one purpose -to make people laugh.
W. C. FIELDSIt ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDSIf it is a joint return, we are instructed to print the given names of both husband and wife. But since some of the names that husband and wife give each other are hardly suited to print, we must proceed cautiously.
W. C. FIELDSSome things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FIELDSYou can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDSIf at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS