I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDSNow don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
More W. C. Fields Quotes
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When you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS -
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS -
You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS -
I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDS -
If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
W. C. FIELDS -
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. FIELDS -
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. FIELDS -
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDS -
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. FIELDS -
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDS -
I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDS -
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDS -
I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. FIELDS -
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS -
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS