If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDSThe only thing a lawyer won’t question is the legitimacy of his mother.
More W. C. Fields Quotes
-
-
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. FIELDS -
Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
W. C. FIELDS -
You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS -
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
W. C. FIELDS -
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS -
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDS -
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS -
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS -
You can’t cheat an honest man.
W. C. FIELDS -
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS -
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS -
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS -
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS -
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS -
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. FIELDS