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My nephew has HDADHD. High Definition Attention Deficit Disorder. He can barely pay attention, but when he does it’s unbelievably clear.

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Attention Believe Himself Myself Sick

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I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
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Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
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I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
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All those who believe in psychokinesis – raise my hand.
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I like to reminisce with people I don’t know.
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I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
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Lost Myself Place Thinking
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
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I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
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Far Forever Goodness Immortal Live Myself
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
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Believe Funny Himself Man Stars Touch
My friend has a baby. I’m recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
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Children Friendship Himself
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
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Eat Food Funny Human
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
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When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m six I’ll be ninety.
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I wish the first word I ever said was the word “quote”, so right before I die I could say “unquote”.
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Death Myself Quote Right Talk Word
If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
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Forest Funny Himself Man Nature Woman Wrong
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
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Funny Literature Word

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