I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
STEVE MARTINTeaching is, after all, a form of show business.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I’ve got to keep breathing. It’ll be my worst business mistake if I don’t.
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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I love money. I love everything about it.
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I have found that– just as in real life–imagination sometimes has to stand in for experience.
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
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Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
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Thankfully, perseverance is a good substitute for talent.
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I started a grease fire at McDonald’s – threw a match in the cook’s hair.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
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I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
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You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
STEVE MARTIN