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Always do business as if the person you’re doing business with is trying to screw you, because he probably is. And if he’s not, you can be pleasantly surprised.

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Business Happiness Person Surprise Try Yourself

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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!
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I really enjoy finding the right word, creating a good, flowing sentence. I enjoy the rhythm of the words.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it’s going to work. And then you get the response. It’s great when it’s good.
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Be so good they can’t ignore you.
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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I’m not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
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Some people have a way with words, and other people; oh, uh, not have way.
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Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
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How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
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Thankfully, perseverance is a good substitute for talent.
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