I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
STEVE MARTINFirst the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
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Be so good they can’t ignore you.
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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
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Teaching is, after all, a form of show business.
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The banjo is such a happy instrument–you can’t play a sad song on the banjo – it always comes out so cheerful.
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
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Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
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Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: naïveté, that fabulous quality that keeps you from knowing just how unsuited you are for what you are about to do.
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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There’s no better way to learn something than to learn it in front of an audience. Your terror drives you.
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Acting has helped me understand people, not only because you are acting as a character, but also because you are watching other actors work. That really helps you identify in life when someone is acting, not being true.
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It’s pain that changes our lives.
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Now let’s repeat the non-conformists’ oath: I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people say! Good!
STEVE MARTIN