Always do business as if the person you’re doing business with is trying to screw you, because he probably is. And if he’s not, you can be pleasantly surprised.
STEVE MARTINI guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.
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I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
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It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing.
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The banjo is such a happy instrument–you can’t play a sad song on the banjo – it always comes out so cheerful.
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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It’s not the size of the nose that matters, it’s what’s inside that counts.
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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.
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You can’t really conduct your life by one or two phrases.
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!
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Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
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Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
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You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
STEVE MARTIN