I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
STEVE MARTINThankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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It’s pain that changes our lives.
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Teaching is, after all, a form of show business.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it’s going to work. And then you get the response. It’s great when it’s good.
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I love money. I love everything about it.
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
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Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: naïveté, that fabulous quality that keeps you from knowing just how unsuited you are for what you are about to do.
STEVE MARTIN