A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
SPIKE MILLIGANAristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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I’m Irish. We think sideways.
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A lot of learning can be a little thing.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGAN