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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.

Ron White

I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
RON WHITE

Back Brave Consider Honor However Inctredinly Many Men Privilege Sacrifice Women
As long as I stay engaged with everybody else, then I’ll create more comedy. It’s just when I shut off and stay at home… What helps me is just to keep moving.
RON WHITE

Comedy Create Engage Everybody Help Home Just Long More Stuff
The first thing I ever got my hands on was Andy Griffith’s ‘What It Was, Was Football.’ I was fascinated with the fact that every syllable made it funny, and I would laugh even though I didn’t know what any of it meant.
RON WHITE

Fascinate First Football Game Hand Imagine Life Listen Made Syllable Talk Thing
The only way to stay sharp is to do live shows. There is no part-time comedy.
RON WHITE

Comedy Live Only Part Sharp Show Stay Time Way
I don’t have a specific plan except for as long as people want to listen to me talk, I’m going to keep talking. I can’t imagine a life without doing standup.
RON WHITE

Except Imagine Kep Life Listen Long People Plan Specific Talk
There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
RON WHITE

Always Been Century Comic More Other Play Quater Time
I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
RON WHITE

Chill Critical Keep Product Spaghetti
My favorite bands are the Allman Brothers and Red Hot Chili Peppers.
RON WHITE

Band Brother Chill Favourite Hot People
Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
RON WHITE

Brother Come Later Number Operate Phone See Something
I write these shows one joke at a time. There’s no continuity. I do try to figure an order to the stories, but there’s not continuity.
RON WHITE

Continuity Figure Joke Little Older Show Story Time
That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
RON WHITE

Beauty Being Help Media Radar Really Star Stay Straight Under
Everybody I know is a joke writer.
RON WHITE

Everybody Joke Know Writer
I’ve never been one to look up the ladder. I’ve always looked down the ladder. As long as there’s one guy down there, I’m fine.
RON WHITE

Been Down Fine Look One Ladder
I’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
RON WHITE

Call Direct Go Movie New Only People Role Wrote
Television is 15 hour days. Movies are 18 hour days. And it’s 18 hours of doing not a thing.
RON WHITE

Day Doing Eighteen Fifteen Hour Movie Television Thing
Diamonds – that’ll shut her up… for a minute!
RON WHITE

Diamond Minute Shut
TV is a hard job. You work 15 hours a day. People tell you what to do. I hate to do it.
RON WHITE

Day Hard Hate Hour Job People Television Tell Work
The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
RON WHITE

Country Good Majestic Theatre
I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that’s all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
RON WHITE

Been Comedian Consider Fun Good Peer Sure
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It’s like anything else. It’s a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
RON WHITE

Exercise Exposure Harder Like More Much Muscle Work Writer
The next time you have a thought… let it go.
RON WHITE

Let Go Next Thought Time
Any time someone achieves success before they’ve earned it, it always comes back to haunt them.
RON WHITE

Achieve Any Back Come Earn Haunt Someone Time
I think the world has their own good, clean, Christian comedy. They don’t need my help.
RON WHITE

Christian Clean Comedy Good Help Need Think World
There’s no idea or concept in comedy you could do that hasn’t been attacked from some angle. But if you start leaving punchlines out so you’ll look cool, I don’t get that. But I don’t watch standup anyway, so I don’t know what they’re doing.
RON WHITE

Angel Attack Comedy Concert Idea Leave Punch Some
You know, my first album, some of those jokes I’d done for twelve years because I couldn’t throw ’em out.
RON WHITE

Album Done First Now Some Throw Out Twelve Year
I want my fans to feel like we’re always in touch. Because without ’em, I wouldn’t be able to do any of this.
RON WHITE

Able Any Fan Feel Like Touch Want
When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
RON WHITE

Back Country Dad Drive Old Range Take Twelve Year

If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.

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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.

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Popular Authors

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