I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
RON WHITEHere’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
More Ron White Quotes
-
-
If I see someone out there mouthing the words to a bit, I’m not having fun.
RON WHITE -
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It’s like anything else. It’s a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
RON WHITE -
It went from Bob Newhart to Flip Wilson to Bill Cosby to Richard Pryor to George Carlin to Cheech and Chong. I had all these records.
RON WHITE -
There’s no idea or concept in comedy you could do that hasn’t been attacked from some angle. But if you start leaving punchlines out so you’ll look cool, I don’t get that. But I don’t watch standup anyway, so I don’t know what they’re doing.
RON WHITE -
I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be there.
RON WHITE -
If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
RON WHITE -
I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. If you’re a painter and someone stretches your canvas, it was collaborative on some level.
RON WHITE -
All I know how to do is take what’s on my mind and spit it out funny. I don’t know what else I could do besides comedy.
RON WHITE -
I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
RON WHITE -
My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
RON WHITE -
I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
RON WHITE -
I had the right to remain silent… but I didn’t have the ability.
RON WHITE -
I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn’t care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to make when I did get there.
RON WHITE -
When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.
RON WHITE -
I’m not willing to drag my fans down a road I don’t believe in. That’s just my one little principle. I’ve only got one, and that’s it.
RON WHITE -
I’ve never been one to look up the ladder. I’ve always looked down the ladder. As long as there’s one guy down there, I’m fine.
RON WHITE -
I don’t know who in my family thinks very fast at all, including me. The things that people see me do onstage are written, so it doesn’t have to be very quick if you have all day with a pen.
RON WHITE -
I could do no wrong in my mother’s eyes from the day I was born. My fans bought her a very nice house in San Antonio, and she has a great life.
RON WHITE -
We always go out looking for live music after our shows.
RON WHITE -
The only thing I really worry about is my live stand-up show because I have to answer to the fans.
RON WHITE -
That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
RON WHITE -
I’ve been married a few times. I’m not good at it.
RON WHITE -
The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
RON WHITE -
If I’m not in the theatre, I’m in an open mic night or doing a guest set at the Comedy Club, or whatever, just trying to develop stuff.
RON WHITE -
I was talking to a guy who was holding his 18-month-old daughter with the only limb he had left, and he had a smile on his face. I thought, ‘I’m not even a 10th of this man.’
RON WHITE -
I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
RON WHITE