I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be there.
RON WHITEAll I know how to do is take what’s on my mind and spit it out funny. I don’t know what else I could do besides comedy.
More Ron White Quotes
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I go to more open mic nights than open mikers.
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There’s no backlog of people we can fire for no reason and act as if they don’t exist.
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I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
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I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
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I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn’t care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to make when I did get there.
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If you watch the ‘Blue Collar Comedy Tour,’ don’t expect that when you come see me by myself, ’cause it’s a little rougher.
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I still love to walk on stage and make people laugh, and I work very, very hard at it, and I take it seriously.
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When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.
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There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
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Ultimately I’m the writer for me, but also, anytime one of my friends gets stuck with a bit, they can call me, and I’m pretty good at helping them get there.
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My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
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My opening acts are always really strong because I need a guy who can take on a big, big crowd. Which is not that easy to do.
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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
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I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
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I was talking to a guy who was holding his 18-month-old daughter with the only limb he had left, and he had a smile on his face. I thought, ‘I’m not even a 10th of this man.’
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