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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

Ron White

I’d rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
RON WHITE

Big Good Part Rather Really
There’s not a pill you can take; there’s not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.
RON WHITE

Class Forever Go Pill Stupid Take
My uncle was a preacher, and I used to go watch him preach. He was also funny, so I’m very ‘preacher-ish’ on stage, not by intent but because that’s where I learned to talk in front of people.
RON WHITE

Funny Intent Preach Preacher Stage Uncle Use Watch
My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
RON WHITE

Between Brain Colander Cross Leak Slow
I’m definitely guilty of thinking something is funny but thinking the audience won’t. Then three years later I will finally try it and it’ll kill them. I got to give them more credit.
RON WHITE

Audience Definite Funny Guilt Kill Later Something Them Think Try
Movies are boring. It’s like watching paint dry. I did a little role in a movie, and it was eight lines. I was there for three days. It’s just horrible.
RON WHITE

Dry Eight Horrible Line More Move Paint Role Threym Day Watch
Comedy is all about the pause.
RON WHITE

Al Comedy Pause
You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
RON WHITE

Go Hammer Me Out Truth
My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
RON WHITE

Behaviour Derive Enough Life Many Need Out Probably Problem Story Wild Year
I was a huge fan of comedy when I was a child.
RON WHITE

Child Comedy Fan Huge
I was talking to a guy who was holding his 18-month-old daughter with the only limb he had left, and he had a smile on his face. I thought, ‘I’m not even a 10th of this man.’
RON WHITE

Daughter Face Guy Hold Left Limb Month Smile Talk Though
I have a very fun life. I don’t recommend it for anybody else, but it sure has been fun for me.
RON WHITE

Else Fun Life Recommend Sure Very
I’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
RON WHITE

Call Direct Go Movie New Only People Role Wrote
Everybody I know is a joke writer.
RON WHITE

Everybody Joke Know Writer
My show is more storytelling now than it’s ever been. It’s what I’m good at.
RON WHITE

Beem Ever Good More Show Storytelling
I write these shows one joke at a time. There’s no continuity. I do try to figure an order to the stories, but there’s not continuity.
RON WHITE

Continuity Figure Joke Little Older Show Story Time
I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
RON WHITE

Always Anybody Funny Guy Make Stand Young
When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
RON WHITE

Back Country Dad Drive Old Range Take Twelve Year
There’s no backlog of people we can fire for no reason and act as if they don’t exist.
RON WHITE

Act Backlog Exist Fire People Reason
I go through about 140 cities a year.
RON WHITE

City Go Through Yera
It went from Bob Newhart to Flip Wilson to Bill Cosby to Richard Pryor to George Carlin to Cheech and Chong. I had all these records.
RON WHITE

All Record Country Flip Had People Went
I don’t watch Comedy Central. I don’t enjoy it.
RON WHITE

Central Comedy Enjoy Watch
As long as I stay engaged with everybody else, then I’ll create more comedy. It’s just when I shut off and stay at home… What helps me is just to keep moving.
RON WHITE

Comedy Create Engage Everybody Help Home Just Long More Stuff
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It’s like anything else. It’s a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
RON WHITE

Exercise Exposure Harder Like More Much Muscle Work Writer
If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it’s being true to their nature… that’s what takes a long time to learn.
RON WHITE

Big Comic Common Denominator Long Look Nature Success True
Television is 15 hour days. Movies are 18 hour days. And it’s 18 hours of doing not a thing.
RON WHITE

Day Doing Eighteen Fifteen Hour Movie Television Thing
I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. If you’re a painter and someone stretches your canvas, it was collaborative on some level.
RON WHITE

Anything Believe Collaborative Creative Partner Some Someone Somewhat Stretch

I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Ron White Quotes