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I don’t know how you feel about old age… but in my case I didn’t even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.

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Age Come How Feel Me Old Rear See Should

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
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Away Children Home Keep Only Parent Some Thing Threaten
The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day.
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Common Day Husband Married Only Same Thing
I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along – but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
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The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.
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I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.
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self-pity is better than none.
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The constants all through the centuries will be the same; wine, women and song. Other than that, life will be very different technologically. In the year 3000 the universe will be expanding as it will forever, infinitely. We will probe outer space but never find life as evolutionized as ours
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Constant Difference Other Same Song Technology Thought Wine Year
Before you get married you should meet your fiance’s parents. It is not enough that you like his parole officer.
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Before Enough Fiance Get Marry Meet Officer Parent Parole
My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle
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Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle – keep away from children.
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Advice Away Bottle Children Follow Keep Transquilzer Work
This woman goes into a gun shop and says, ‘I want to buy a gun for my husband.’ The clerk says, ‘Did he tell you what kind of gun?’ ‘No,’ she replied. ‘He doesn’t even know I’m going to shoot him.
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Buy Get Gun Husbvband Into No Reply Say Shop Women
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
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Age Back Do Go More Than
My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.
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Cheap Christmas Committed Eve Fre Husband Kids Santa Shot Suicide Tell
When I go to the beach, even the tide won’t come in.
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Beach Come Even Go Tide
Aim high, and you won’t shoot your foot off.
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Aim Fool High Off Shoot
You know you’re old when your walker has an airbag.
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Airbag Now Old Walkertr

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