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They just elected me Mis Phonograph Record of 1966. They discovered my measurements were 33 1/2, 45, 78!

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Country Discover Elect Eyewear Just Measurement People Person

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Nothing was happening in the bedroom. I nicknamed our waterbed the Dead Sea.
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Bedroom Dead Nickname Nothing Happen Sea Waterbed
If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.
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Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
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Love Man Marry Money Nothing Tennis
I like to serve chocolate cake, because it doesn’t show the dirt.
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The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
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Football never Olay Outfit Public Reason Same Wear Women
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
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Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
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Chance Housework Kill Rake You
I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.
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Descend Foolish Listen Long Mother Very
… if they [your children] write their names in the dust on the furniture, don’t let them put the year.
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Children Dust Furniture Love Name Write Yera
Doctors say it’s okay to have sex after a heart attack, provided you close the ambulance door.
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After Ambulance Attack Close Doctor Door Heart Okay Provide
I spent seven hours in a beauty shop… and that was for the estimate.
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You’ve got to realize that when all goes well, and everything is beautiful, you have no comedy. It’s when somebody steps on the bride’s train, or belches during the ceremony that you’ve got comedy!
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Beautiful Bribe Comedy Everything Goes Got Realize Somebody Step Train
I’m looking for a perfume to overpower men – I’m sick of karate.
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Karate Look Overpower Perfume Sick
Oh, that dog! Ever hear of a German Shepherd that bites its nails? Barks with a lisp? You say, “Attack!” And he has one. All he does is piddle. He’s nothing but a fur-covered kidney that barks.
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Attack Country Dog Even Hear Ible Lisp Mail One People Person Piddle
Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
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Always Before Down Drink Fall Friend Health
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
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Away Children Home Keep Only Parent Some Thing Threaten

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