Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman – or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
GEORGE BURNSI’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
More George Burns Quotes
-
-
Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GEORGE BURNS -
I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
GEORGE BURNS -
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn’t ask me, I’d still have to say it.
GEORGE BURNS -
Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up.
GEORGE BURNS -
If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.
GEORGE BURNS -
I can’t afford to die; I’d lose too much money.
GEORGE BURNS -
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
GEORGE BURNS -
I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
GEORGE BURNS -
I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
GEORGE BURNS -
At my age flowers scare me.
GEORGE BURNS -
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
GEORGE BURNS -
Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
GEORGE BURNS -
Be quick to learn and wise to know.
GEORGE BURNS -
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
GEORGE BURNS -
This is the sixth book I’ve written, which isn’t bad for a guy who’s only read two.
GEORGE BURNS