Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
GEORGE BURNSI would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
More George Burns Quotes
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If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.
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I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
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You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.
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I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
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I’m at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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If it’s a good script I’ll do it. And if it’s a bad script, and they pay me enough, I’ll do it.
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I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere.
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Be quick to learn and wise to know.
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The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
GEORGE BURNS -
It’s good to be here. At 98, it’s good to be anywhere.
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It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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You’ve got to be honest; if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
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You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.
GEORGE BURNS -
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
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Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
GEORGE BURNS -
I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
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I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
GEORGE BURNS -
Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up.
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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
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I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
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This is the sixth book I’ve written, which isn’t bad for a guy who’s only read two.
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I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
GEORGE BURNS