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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

Bob Saget

I become a chameleon for wherever I am.
BOB SAGET

Become Chameleon Whenever
The nature of comedy is ‘just do it.’ But I think what’s interesting about it is this joke has been around and why. And it’s just saying what’s wrong and how wrong can you be if you say it.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Interesting Thinking
I’m completely changing my diet. My nutritionist recommends I must now stop eating food I have already eliminated.
BOB SAGET

Diets Eating Food
Valuable people are undervalued.
BOB SAGET

People Undervalued Valuable
I was in a supermarket and I saw Paul Newman’s face on salad dressing and spaghetti sauce….I thought he was missing.
BOB SAGET

Dressing Missing Salad Sauce
I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.
BOB SAGET

Nice Pieces Salmon
If you’re hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?
BOB SAGET

Hanging Negative People Two
If you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
BOB SAGET

Career Eight Wise
No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.
BOB SAGET

Bus Driver Drivers
They say, Keep your enemies closer. But what if you live with them?
BOB SAGET

Closer Enemies Say
My haircutter figured out I whine less if I’m under general anesthesia. I just hope when I awaken they haven’t given me a Brazilian wax.
BOB SAGET

Anesthesia Given Havens
A good way to keep your relationship together is not to scream in terror when you see your partner naked.
BOB SAGET

Good Naked Together Way
I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don’t want to make fun of people.
BOB SAGET

Acting Fun People
In the creative sense, I’m looking forward to collaborating with people I have mutual respect for to create some really good work.
BOB SAGET

Creative Forward Looking People
I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGET

Boys Car Country Years
My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
BOB SAGET

Fart Father Stuck

I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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