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What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz.

Bob Saget

I don’t roll like that but I’ve never been with a hooker either. Yeah, that’s good to say in an interview cause I feel bad a little because people grew up watching me and that’s a little disturbing.
BOB SAGET

Interviews Littles People
I love my mom! You can too for $12!
BOB SAGET

Affection Emotion Love Mom
Think well of yourself and others will too. Unless those others are in government, banking, or show business.
BOB SAGET

Banking Government Thinking
Yet there are some people – Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he’s a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I’m doing it right now and you all seem bored.
BOB SAGET

Bored People Talking
Nobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGET

Except Nobody People
I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGET

Boys Car Country Years
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
BOB SAGET

Baby Feet Pedicures
I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.
BOB SAGET

Doorways May Stressed Unflattered
Behind every great man in prison is another great man in prison.
BOB SAGET

Behind Every Great Man Men Prison
I’m completely changing my diet. My nutritionist recommends I must now stop eating food I have already eliminated.
BOB SAGET

Diets Eating Food
No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.
BOB SAGET

Bus Driver Drivers
Ladies, apologies, but isn’t ‘vintage’ just used stuff?
BOB SAGET

Apology Stuff Vintage
I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET

Censor Sick World
There are no I’s in we but there are two i’s in Wii.
BOB SAGET

Country People Two Wii
The favorite method of vice is to diss all responsibility be work or social, go off by myself, and enjoy a good steak and a great glass of wine. Oh yeah, and my kids are there too.
BOB SAGET

Kids Responsibility Wine
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET

Gossip People Rumor

What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz.

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What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz.

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Popular Authors

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