If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPETiming is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I’ve always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.
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A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
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I do try to work out a little. I go swimming twice a day. It beats buying golf balls.
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Golf is a funny game. It’s done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I’m the healthiest idiot in the world.
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It’s not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course – you just follow the wounded.
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I can’t give up Golf, I’ve got too many sweaters.
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Everybody knows what California smog is – that’s fog with the vitamins removed.
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You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
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The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent’s handshake.
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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
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I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
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Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
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I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
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It’s amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn’t sell theirs threw them away.
BOB HOPE