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Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?

Bob Hope

For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
I just hope I don’t have to explain all the times I’ve used His name in vain when I get up there.
BOB HOPE

Get Golf Names Vain
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
BOB HOPE

Country Humorous People Soup
There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Personality Talented
I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.
BOB HOPE

Age Golf Play Tried Weight
Everybody is afraid they won’t have any money after they die, but Jack Benny discovered a way to take it with him. He had his appendix taken out and a piggy bank put in.
BOB HOPE

Discover Funny Money Taken
Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
BOB HOPE

Business Golf Green Pay
I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPE

Caddies Golf Lying
The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn’t got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
BOB HOPE

Apart Dog Miles Pet Tree
Perfume acts as an anesthetic. By the time she floats a little your way, you’ll promise her anything.
BOB HOPE

Country Littles People Promise Way
Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
BOB HOPE

Culture Hands Moving
He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England
BOB HOPE

Country Good Line Look One
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
BOB HOPE

Age Growing Long
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Direction Helping Life Wondering
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration

Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?

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Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?

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