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In this country your guilty until proven wealthy.

Bill Maher

If conservatives get to call universal healthcare ‘socialized medicine,’ I get to call private, for-profit healthcare ‘soulless, vampire bastards making money off human pain.’
BILL MAHER

Conservative Human Money Myself Profit Universal
Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.
BILL MAHER

Change Disease Sin
America is like a dog. I’m sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can’t actually explain issues to a dog.
BILL MAHER

Dog Explanation Issues Myself Sorry Understand
Idiots must stop claiming that atheism is a religion. Religion is defined as the belief in and worship of a superhuman controlling power. And atheism is… precisely not that. Atheism is a religion like abstinence is a sex position.
BILL MAHER

Atheist Definition Idiot Position Religion Sex
You want to spend your millions on a worthless cause? Try donating it to the Democrats.
BILL MAHER

Democracy Donate Money Yourself
Just honest. To me, being ‘politically incorrect’ means the opposite of being political — which means to spin everything. That’s all it’s ever meant to me. It’s never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.
BILL MAHER

Conservatism Honesty Liberal Myself Politics Spin
Some people think I enjoy debate. I don’t. I wish everyone agreed with me; it would save a lot of time.
BILL MAHER

Debate Enjoyment Myself People Thinking Time
Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?
BILL MAHER

Original Social Media Time
In the Republican party, crazy is a constituency.
BILL MAHER

Constituency Crazy Politics
At some point in the last 20 years, the left moved to the center, and the right moved into a mental institution.
BILL MAHER

Institution Mental Move Point Time
I don’t respect religon. I don’t respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.
BILL MAHER

Myself Religion Respect Thinking
I don’t understand why the police are infallible. They remind me a lot of the Catholic Church.
BILL MAHER

Police Religious Reminder Understand
Emergency rooms will be used the way they were intended to be used: not for primary care, but for when the average freaky American get some strange object up his ass.
BILL MAHER

Himself Intention Object Room Strange Way
Hot women have to stop putting long paragraphs of text on their bodies. I know you think it’s sexy but one thing that men never think is, “Gee, you know what would make this sex better? Having something to read.”
BILL MAHER

Hot Man Reading Stop Thinking Woman World
I don’t say that I’m an atheist. I don’t like that term, because I think it mirrors the certitude of religion. I say I don’t know. And if you don’t know – and you don’t – just man up and say you don’t know. Don’t turn to silly stories and ancient myths.
BILL MAHER

Ancient Atheist Man Myth Religion Story Thinking
One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
BILL MAHER

Advantage Atheist Time Yourself

In this country your guilty until proven wealthy.

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In this country your guilty until proven wealthy.

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