Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
ANDY ROONEYGo to bed. Whatever you’re staying up late for isn’t worth it.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
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Don’t keep saying, “I don’t know where the time goes.” It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
ANDY ROONEY -
It isn’t working that’s so hard, it’s getting ready to work.
ANDY ROONEY -
We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.
ANDY ROONEY -
I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That money doesn’t buy class.
ANDY ROONEY -
A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?”. She doesn’t care what you think.
ANDY ROONEY -
It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That life is tough, but I’m tougher.
ANDY ROONEY -
When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more kindergartens and fewer graduate schools.
ANDY ROONEY -
Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
ANDY ROONEY -
I’d be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn’t believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each other but I don’t think it does.
ANDY ROONEY -
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’m always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.
ANDY ROONEY -
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
ANDY ROONEY -
My most serious character flaw is that I don’t deny myself much.
ANDY ROONEY -
I didn’t get old on purpose, it just happened. If you’re lucky, it could happen to you.
ANDY ROONEY -
Civilization means conforming to a standard of behavior that may not seem natural to us.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That when you’re in love, it shows.
ANDY ROONEY -
Most of us believe everyone has a right to his own opinion – as long as it agrees with ours.
ANDY ROONEY -
Age is nothing but experience, and some of us are more experienced than others
ANDY ROONEY -
All of us talk faster than we listen.
ANDY ROONEY -
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
ANDY ROONEY -
In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
ANDY ROONEY -
Don’t you hate it when, your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?
ANDY ROONEY -
The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
ANDY ROONEY