Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
AMBROSE BIERCEOpposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
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Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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