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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Ambrose Bierce

PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Body Fortune Goodness Purity Uncomfortable
Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Animal Digest Eat Goodness Man Science
Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Company Interior Laughter Noise
IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fact Imagination Lying Poet
Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Faith Holy Ourselves Religion Scripture Writing
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Age Believe Fools Hard Thinking Wisdom Young
Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Best Gift God Man
Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Call Distance Poor Rich Willing
Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Device Profit Responsibility
The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Affection Creature Dog World
There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Adventure Knowledge Old Sun Wisdom
RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Assassination Character Weapon
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Coward Emergency Himself Legs Thinking
Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Believe Divine Need Neighbor Religion Spiritual
The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Book Distance
REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Art Charm Measurement Nature Worm

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

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