Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
AMBROSE BIERCEOcean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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