I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again.
ALAN KINGAs a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
More Alan King Quotes
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Modesty is not one of my virtues.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
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Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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I was a high school throw-out.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
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I won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
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Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
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It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
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You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
ALAN KING -
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING