Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
ALAN KINGNow that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
More Alan King Quotes
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I won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
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It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
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The other day my house caught fire.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
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Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
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Modesty is not one of my virtues.
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For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
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I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KING






