Modesty is not one of my virtues.
ALAN KINGMy favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
More Alan King Quotes
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For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
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When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, ‘You’re doing a Jewish act.’
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator…
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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I always plan dinner first thing in the morning.
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My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
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Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or ‘stage’ Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.
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Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
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I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again.
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KING






