Don’t do your best, do my best.
ADAM CAROLLAPeople have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I know there’s no God and I know most of the world knows that as well. They just won’t admit it because there’s another thing they know. They know they’re going to die and it freaks them out.
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I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I’ve worked with women, I’ve never had an issue with women.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money – do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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I’ve always boxed, I always taught boxing.
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Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn’t break it down piece by piece, stage by stage.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.
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Maybe I’m delusional but I’m usually funny. It’s not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average.
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I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera – sort of low-key. I don’t like being on camera stuff that much.
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
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I don’t like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it’s the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they’re pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
ADAM CAROLLA