It’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
ADAM CAROLLA[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail twice a month.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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Telling them to stop isn’t going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.
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If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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All’s the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
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When I’m in power, here’s how I’m gonna put the country back on its feet. I’m going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the ‘tardiest of the ‘tards like the thick crust.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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I don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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I don’t normally vote. I’m lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
ADAM CAROLLA