Welfare is monetary methadone.
ADAM CAROLLAI didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
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All TV is, is really: ‘Don’t you want to be this, aren’t you glad you’re not that.’ There’s nothing really in the middle.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys.
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Everyone keeps saying, “Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating.” It’s like saying, “How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she’s been with Brad Pitt?” I don’t care.
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It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I’ve done so much morning radio that I won’t be overwhelmed by it, but it’s still going to be a challenge.
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I’m a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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I’m harmless. I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you’re that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
ADAM CAROLLA