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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.

Adam Carolla

And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
ADAM CAROLLA

Asian Common Country Goal Guttenberg Hispanic Together
You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
ADAM CAROLLA

Accomplishment Feel Good Should Yelled Yourself
I don’t know anything about computers.
ADAM CAROLLA

Aware Computer Function Know Knowlege Work
I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much.
ADAM CAROLLA

Like Performing Radio Stuff Television Watching
Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
ADAM CAROLLA

Bed Difficulty Honestly Kind Relaxing Stuff
The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing.
ADAM CAROLLA

Compelling Good Host Podcast
If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
ADAM CAROLLA

Museums Rembrandt Somebody Spend Walking
I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
ADAM CAROLLA

Burn Calories Happen Masculine Trying World
Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they’re so suggestible.
ADAM CAROLLA

Besides Birth Control Everything Funny Giving Humor Pill Women
I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
ADAM CAROLLA

Click Daughter Dude Funnier Gonna Mediocre Sense Staff Tell Writer
When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
ADAM CAROLLA

Christmas Country Dad Feel Instantly Kid Wrong
But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Drywall Hundred Idea Making Stacking Thousand
When you do television, there’s more to do, and when you do new television, there’s a lot more to do, especially when you don’t have partner. I miss not having that person.
ADAM CAROLLA

Especially Lot Missing More Partner Television
Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
ADAM CAROLLA

Butch Dyke Funny Humor Lesbian Lipstick Sweatpant Thinking
I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they’re making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.
ADAM CAROLLA

Bigger Commercial Funny Humor Maxi Nice Pad Visual
Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
ADAM CAROLLA

Desire Infused Need Office Passion Patriotism Place Probably Vigor

I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.

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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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