The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
ADAM CAROLLAThe reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
-
-
I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.
ADAM CAROLLA -
We’re all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that’s out of this world. I’ll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn’t have to be between Thai and Mexican every night.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Welfare is monetary methadone.
ADAM CAROLLA -
It’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I’m a comedian, not a politician.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they’re making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.
ADAM CAROLLA -
He doesn’t sound like a guy who’s done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.
ADAM CAROLLA -
The truth is we’re all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else’s book.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
ADAM CAROLLA -
Maybe I’m delusional but I’m usually funny. It’s not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average.
ADAM CAROLLA -
I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.
ADAM CAROLLA