Don’t do your best, do my best.
ADAM CAROLLAI don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it’s about fudge packing and triple D’s at 13.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
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It’s like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
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It’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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I’m like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
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I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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I don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
ADAM CAROLLA